LOL, I would have to say I don't agree with you on all this. I'm not a Dyson lover but user and I'm always looking for something better.
In test #1 there is NO sharp corners anywhere on a dyson DC14 tubing. I have used mine for well over 2 years now and NEVER ONCE had it clog. I could see it happen on any vacuum if you don't properly maintain it. I clean and sanitize mine between every job..
In test #2#3#10 come on now. This dyson has LOTS of suction. If your readings were correct compared to a DC14 then a Kirby wouldn't it be impossible to use? It would suck the carpet so hard it wouldn't allow any air to flow. I used several Vacuums in my day and the Dyson is at the top of suction compared to others I've used. Kirby may have more but the Dyson has Plenty.
In test #4 I can't see the Dyson not picking up more. One thing with the DC14 that you probably don't know is when you lean it back to vacuum 9 times out of 10 it doesn't lock in place therefore leaving the plate higher off the ground and losing suction. You have to actually push it down and lock it in place. So maybe that happened to you. I have seen this happen on 3 different dysons.
In test #5 reliability/durability, the dyson may be made of plastic but its not cheap, trust me. I transport mine all over and never had 1 single piece break. I even bang on the empty canister everyday to knock the loose dust out and it still never broke or even cracked for that matter. In 2 years and lots and lots and lots of vacuuming it only had a clutch go out and thats probably cause when I 1st got it I would switch the roller on/off without 1st putting it in stand up mode. Which destroys the clutch. So to me it has been VERY RELIABLE.
In test #6 It took you 19 seconds to go from vacuum mode to putting on a duster tool. What did you take a smoke break in between? This is the #1 reason why I use this vacuum everyday. No other vacuum is as convenient as this to my knowledge. To go from vacuum mode all you need to do is lock it in stand up mode, what 1 second, then grab the duster tool which is right on the canister, another second, then place it on the hose handle, another second and then pull out the handle, another second. So total 4 seconds maybe 5 if you screw up. Being this fast to go from vacuum mode to having a long hose in seconds you can now reach in any corner or underneath any piece of furniture. Lets see the Kirby do that.
It was at this point in your testing that I knew something was fishy. I always had a bad impression on Kirbys for there sales tactics. According to your tests its a good vacuum, which it may be, but I never gave it a chance due to its image. It may beat out the dyson on most areas but for me I like its convenience and suction. I know it doesn't leave as much dirt on the floor as you were saying. Myself and customers alike are shocked when I show them the canister full of dirt. Some homes I even fill it up twice and thats even doing it twice a month. It would probably get even more if it wasn't regularly vacuumed.
In test #7 the Dyson easily should have one this. You only need 3 tools to do any job which the dyson does with very easy access. Just because the kirby had more doesn't mean its better. You probably would never use them anyway because you don't have easy access to them
In test #8 How can you give that to Kirby just because the dyson has more seals. Just cause there's more doesn't mean they don't work good. You even said a " leading consumer magazine gave them the same ratings" so you just gave it to kirby cause you like it better. Plus some of the seals on the Dyson are before the vacuum so its not like its allowing dirty air to escape if anything its sucking it in and HEPA filtering it. Also there are 10 seals On the DC14 not 7 like you said, so the 3 you were missing would cause a low reading when you were testing the suction & airflow power .
So all in all I think the dyson should have ranked up better compared to the kirby if not better. Also if you would have made more catagories the dyson could have even beaten the kirby. Like ease of Transportation, price or hard surface vacuuming. I think the kirby is prone to scratching hardwood.
The kirby pretty much only beat the dyson in your test by power airflow and suction and I really can't see that being true anyway. I think the dyson has plenty of suction for the everyday use. Also there are better Dysons out there than the DC14 , I don't know if that was the best Kirby or not, But you may have been comparing apples to oranges.