The Bacon Tree
Two fellows are stuck in the desert, wandering aimlessly and close to death. They are close to just lying down and waiting for the inevitable, when all of a sudden...
"Hey Joe, do you smell what I smell? It’s bacon I am sure of it."
"yes, Jim. It smells like bacon to me."
So, with renewed strength, they struggle up the next sand dune, and there, in the distance, is a tree loaded with bacon. There's raw bacon, dripping with moisture, there's fried bacon, back bacon, double smoked bacon - every imaginable kind of cured pig meat.
"Joe, Joe, we are saved. It’s a bacon tree."
"Jim, are you sure it’s not a mirage? We're in the desert don't forget."
"Joe when did you ever hear of a mirage that smell like bacon... it’s no mirage, it’s a bacon tree."
And with that, Jim races towards the tree. He gets to within 5 yards, Joe following closely behind, when all of a sudden, a machine gun opens up, and Jim is cut down in his tracks. It is clear he is mortally wounded, but, a true friend that he is, he manages to warn Joe with his dying breath.
"Joe, go back man! You was right; it’s not a bacon tree."
"Jim my friend... what is it?"
"Joe, it’s not a bacon tree...it’s, it’s, it’s, it’s a ham bush."